those bitches were sniggering at my man-pris like they were goddesses of fashion!
...dude i pray you are quoting something, someone, anyone...
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
its like think what a normal person would think but completely the opposite.
this ugly chick literally cried last night because i wouldnt let her give me head
just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I just noticed that my shirt smells like coffee after eating out a Barista
There is ecstasy everywhere. Get over here right no5w. The 5 is silent.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
I'm currently making some changes in my life. If you don't hear from me anymore, then you're probably one of them. Or I'm dead.
Wow i don't think I've had to send this many texts apologizing for my behavior since high school...
Hey, I'm probably about to be arrested but I didn't want to wake you. But it would be cool of you to get the $500.00 I have in the box I keep my "medicine" in and come bail me out. Also I figured you would be amused at the thought of me fending off brutal prison rape tonight.
He's like a Lana del Rey song that took human form
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
He agreed to matching Christmas pajamas today, no guy does that for a girl he’s not seriously considering marrying.
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