Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
our health teacher's ringtone is Bad Romance and she has a tramp stamp. i will not skip this class, ever.
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
I'm not sure which is worse. The fact that I slept with him last night, or the fact that you did too.
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
he just kept saying "come on iron man, you can do this!" to himself the whole time..
Somehow me showing up to/breaking into her house only to find I was a week early for the party became a night of weed cookies and sex.
Bathtub guy came to. He helped me roll the fat chick away from the fridge. Shower and breakfast are on. You're plan failed!
I just can't even fathom the crazy and I work at a mental hospital.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
So pro tip. do not order drugs from india and then assume you know your tolerance level.
I'm not well. Although it could be worse.
My cousin is so hungover she quit her job.
He went three whole days without making a star wars reference, of course he got sex
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
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