apparently it's not kosher to shit in a litter box when there's a line for the bathroom
I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
The Rock is playing the tooth fairy. I can't believe I used to smell what that man was cooking
I feel like all of the victims from Seven. Best birthday weekend ever.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
We have a bucket list tonight. Not done yet. Gotta climb a building
Adults smoke weed in footie pajamas man. You just gotta accept me for who I am.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
MY DAD KEEPS LIKING PORN LINKS/ALBUMS ON FACEBOOK AND THEY ALL SHOW UP IN MY NEWSFEED
I mean it's up to you where you want to sleep but I'm telling you you're going to hear us have sex no matter what room you're in.
Fair enough
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
Tonight’s your last chance for a danger free blowjob.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Every time I see this chick she's swimming naked at a pool party. That's gotta mean something right?
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
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