You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
ugly people sure do ruin things
Maybe we should try and tone it down a notch. The neighbors changed the name of their wifi network to "i can hear you having sex".
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
I think I've lost the thrill of being a slut. It's just that the newness has worn off, I think.
at least i was responsible enough to take off my shoe and throw up in it
I don't know ur idea of a good first date but I'm pretty sure it shouldn't include him holding my hair while I puke in the street
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
Ive waited a long time for a girl with prescriptions like yours.
Would your heart desire to drink copious amounts of alcohol tonight?
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
He fingered me in a Waffle House bathroom and then stole a traffic cone. Is this love that I'm feeling?
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
I'm ne vrr drinkjng againnnnnnnn dforeal.
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
Randomize
