I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
yo dude i was totally schwabbin last night.
what does that even mean?
you ever see those charles schwabb commercials, where the people are like half cartoon half real.... well yeah i saw that in real life.
Still at the library. i hate tax accounting so much that i've started calling it potions...
I should have kept drinking, a coma can't be as bad as this hangover
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
Why yes. I did get laid looking like that. My sheets look like there was a clown orgy
I think my body is a cloud. This mixture of things is heavenly. Dare was wrong, drugs are awesome.
On my way home from the dentist. Was going to call and see if you would like to wake and bake, then remembered my sister is an adult
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
Haha I'M GOING TO MISS HIS PENIS SO MUCH. But not his bipolarness.
3.5 bazillion penises. So not that hard to find a new good one
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
What's a professional way to say get your shit in gear?
Randomize
