Ok seriously, can we bring back badminton?
Why do I feel like that's not the first time you've drank champagne with someone dressed as a unicorn?
My roommate just called. He's in Miami and has no idea how he got there. He also has a ticket to Buenos Aires that he can't explain. I figured you'd have the explanation.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
I Think it is all interconnected. Emma caused most of the nakedness
Chasing shots by shotgunning beers is not a good idea.
He drew a face on his balls with a sharpie. It was like giving head to a unicorn.
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
FUCK YOU VODKA I'M TRYING TO ADULT RIGHT NOW
But I am still fully ok with my life choices as long as the consequences aren't onesies and pacifiers
He showed up at my house with roses and a bottle of vodka... to watch a movie. obvi i took the vodka and didn't sleep with him
So, I think think I left my underwear at your house. Well...not exactly your house but your roof.
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