we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Regardless, you never quit out of your interenet. You left your porn on the living room comp. Then you passed out four feet from the chair with your hand still down your pants. We decided that we should go back to her place instead. Worlds best wingman.
my fingers and penis are no longer on speaking terms. My penis is too jealous of where my fingers get to go.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
it's official, i know exactly what cross streets we're at by the bumps when i give him road head
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
How is it possible that i have sex with a guy and he makes YOU breakfast
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
My ex wife just asked to go over our divorce papers and for sex in the same text
I feel like parents watching our children. You want to step in and help them but you just have to let them make their mistakes
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
i feel like if we ever had babies together they would just be drunk all the time
I remember 2 things. 1. Hanging through the window. 2. And she needing a bucket to puke in. That’s all. I have no other memory.
After returning from the hospital with lock-jaw from getting tackle at the game. Some naked chick busted out of his room and hit him with a devastating haymaker to the jaw because he wouldn't have sex
Randomize
