Dude, don't freak out but the girl who stuck the hair brush in her ass is here. I can't look her in the eye!!
Every good night starts with white castle burgers and shots in the parking lot.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
i was like his sober eyes girls would come up to us, show us theirs and if approved by me blew him, if rejected they went to my truck with a bottle of patron
Bring condoms and burritos. The rest will fall into place
i think dick pics are a sign of a sexual renaissance
She sucks enough dick that I could make her mouth a legitimate Yelp location.
if i ever wake up in the morning and don't feel a boner in my asscrack then this relationship is over
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
Chick in the reindeer getup puked on Baby Jesus last night. But then she bought us all empanadas so she's cool.
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