do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
omg kevin jonas gave his bride a glass slipper..could he be any gayer then he is now
he is so gay. he makes clay aiken look straight. what is wrong with the lady that married him? kevin must be envious of her balls
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Ok...drunk girls at the bar are charging $1 for motorboating. It's fucking WEDNESDAY. I never want to leave.
if they reproduce, their children will be the worst quarters players ever
I can't right now...you know Sunday night is whn I get drunk and do laundry.
It's not that drunk me is smarter; it's that sober me is secretly playing for the other team.
marshmallow pipe was a success. so was melon pipe. come try it
It was one of those you-have-no-other-way-home-and-we-already-made-out-so-I-guess-youre-coming-home-with-me-if-you-promise-to-leave-early kind of deals.
I told you naked hot tub wrestling would turn bad now one of us has a gash on the head and another a black eye
Apparently I called down to the hotel front desk and begged them to bring us pizza. They brought us tea.
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
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