How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
you busted in the room, ripped the covers off of us, ... and fist pumped
I'll still trying to understand the context of your "punch her with my cock" comment.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
It's like a party bus, but there's a glass, airtight wall separating the driver from the passengers, and once everyone's on, they pump vaporized THC into the cabin.
Night is still young. Puking guts out part of it just began
In case you're wondering where my head is at right now, it's wishing that I was getting laid and not having a debate about cheese.
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I yelled at the cab driver to slow down because my unborn children live here, and pointed to my uterus. I think my message was lost in translation though because he immediately offered me his card...
Sara can't come to the phone right now. She's currently having an in-depth conversation with a flower pot.
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
What's the blow job-backrub exchange rate these days? I've got some killer stress knots
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
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