"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
Fuck you I wanted that fabulous flaming homo to win american idol...its like we lost the gay marriage vote...again
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Something smells like weed and I think it might be my mascara. Come sniff my eyes
Well let's just say that she ended up trying to get it in with the wheelchair guy, who btw, can get an erection and quickly I might add
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Did I really just find a cheez- it box full of condoms in your room?
I need a Jamo leash. Just tie it to my wrist and every time you see me reaching for a shot of it, just yank my hand away
I should become her mentor. Get her life back together for her
You mean sponsor?
I was just thrown into the pool and now I'm surrounded by men... You would think this is the dream but I'm just confused
I think we should have a sex position advent calendar
someone at the bars was yelling at the bouncer to let him in because he "just passed through the 7 levels of the candy cane forrest" soulmate?
go meet him and give him your number.
I was puking for like ten minutes when I realized my parents were fucking in the shower and were afraid to come out
Randomize
