I didn't cheat on him. Cheating means finding out. I made sure he was at work first. After the guy left I got shitfaced just so nothing seemed out of the ordinary when he came home.
For Halloween this year I'm gonna go as Angelina from Jersey Shore. I'm gonna yell "umm HELLO?!," cockblock someone, then leave the party early
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
Watching Fresh Prince at 9am with a beer in hand and he just said to Uncle Phil "Sometimes I worry that I'll never get my life together." I feel like that was a sign from above or something
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
He woke me up at 4am just to lick my nipple. Then he talked in his sleep for 20 minutes about the sex we just had. I think it's safe to say he's a weird one, but I dont care cuz he fucks like a champ.
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
Her brother is definitely not gay. I hooked up with him when she was sleeping.
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
But how will the next generation learn about life choices without a Jersery Shore?
I got slapped by a drag queen and bitten on the arm by either a random girl or a weird mouth shaped dog. Tough to tell without seeing the teeth
I'm more of a "get high and take a bath" kinda guy.
Please don't throw the wedding bouquet at me
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize