is this the sara with the beer cane?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
She's more than welcome to come too, so long as she has gotten over that me being responsible for the death of her cat thing.
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Whatever. I'll just fuck him now and deal with the clingyness later.
I don't wanna be gay for a night.
I think it would be worth it for free alcohol.
We have started to decorate penises.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
I told some guy on tinder, that apparently has a prosthetic leg, that I think we started off on the wrong foot. I hate myself...
Made out with sailor moon tonight. Childhood dreams do come true.
Randomize
