I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
Drinking bud light and eating rice cakes...this is the closest to getting in shape for spring break as its going to get.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
He just sent me a winky face in the middle of setting up a drug deal. You don't do that.
I would be the drunk girl eating cake on the front steps alone.
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Hey, remember when Hot Stuff played in the back of the ambulance? Or no, cause of your concussion...
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Try eating a sub blackout with your uncle. It's not easy ok
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
You know it was a good night when you wake up w/o a shirt in someone elses living room next to a pancake on a spoon in a bowl of spaghetti.
Can you leave her a note saying "did you enjoy watching me fuck your roommate?"
I will.
it was like 6 shots in and he was automatically my type
Randomize
