I may or may not have melted a dent into the top of my minifridge with my hot glue gun, which I left on for the past couple hours unsupervised, while we were on our salvo/savers excursion. Welcome to Halloween in college.
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
hey everyone... booty call? my house tonight. bring friends to fuck my friends.
And surprisingly enough iPhone does not have an app for Russian mail order brides.
My history teacher just took his shirt off cuz the classroom was to hot. And then he invited us all to join him.
They are baked and once again have spent the last 45 mins talking about opening up a world wide business called "pickle on a stick"
The strip club called, they have your shoe.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
We simultaneously blacked out then simultaneously came to then simultaneously had sex with the neighbors. We're definitely meant to be roommates.
At least he's enough of a gentleman to not make me do the walk of shame dressed as Santa.
Topless bubble bath with a lesbian is debatable as a gay experience.
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
Just used my flashlight app to find a gummy lifesaver I dropped on the floor
I like how you're utilizing your resources
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
Randomize
