bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
you broke into my aparment at three in the morning wearing long johns and offered me beer.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
Dude you didn't move for like 2 hours then suddenly sang the chorus to ghetto superstar and passed back out
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Have you ever stopped and thought "I do NOT want to be inside of this person right now. Or ever." Because you should.
Here's what I don't understand. How does anyone watch you eat mayo for 12 minutes and then ever fuck you again??
Signs you do Molly too much. Glow sticks fallout of random articles of clothing on academic row
I feel like at this point in my life I should be dating someone who doesn't run out of all his money on Mondays and have to wait til fridy to buy his weed
We could put on there: "Drink jager bombs and do stupid shit faster, with more energy!"
Yo. What's your name again? You put "don't tell your landlord" as your name lol
Trust me.. Might look gay.. Might feel gay... But I could snap your neck with my inside thighs bro
What kind of paramedic is he, some dude is dying back there and he's trying to get laid
Whatever, ill dance on the bar at applebees, don't try and act like you're above it.
when I finally convinced you to get off the floor you looked at me wild-eyed and said "the carpet was a VAST EXPANSE OF SEA"
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