the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
I wish life was like dora the explorer where dancing pigs appear out of nowhere to solve your problems for you
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
You came home with a traffic cone and said, "this is my birthday condom."
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
I though he and I knew each other well enough that we could go to my hotel room to do a bunch of cocaine together without their being any homoerotic implications, but NOOOOOOOOO!
Are you coming down for 4/20 or does Easter kinda fuck that up for you?
I'm just trying to find the strength to put my bra back on and come inside
well. can officially check "get caught having sex on the front porch by the neighbors" off the bucket list.
If he sends me a dick pic so help me god.
I'm extremely upset that I wasted my "having sex with a guy at work" card on him
It'd be good to change things up a bit, right now the only public service I'm doing from my apt is hanging out in my underwear with the lights on.
I could hear it slapping against his thighs under the robe!!!!!!!!! You are a lucky girl!
Randomize
