Wow, you were right... Weed does start conversations
getting your period on valentines day is like an extra little fuck you, now you REALLY have no chance of sex tonight.
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Lmao the neighbor heard yall last night She wanted me to tell you way to finish strong
Mega depressed bro. Had the greatest sex with the hottest girl I've ever seen and in the AM she gave me that look I've given dozens of times. I'm her drunken fat chick fuck
please tell me why my pillow is wearing your thong...
...i wondered where i left that...
Heard in class today that they replaced our carpet in last years apartment because they couldn't get the smell out, dude we smoked way to much pot last year.
She basically needs a man who will never act up and take all of her shit
I'm even having trouble finding a guy who's taller than me with no unibrow.. someone needs to tell her its time to lower her standards
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Oh my God it's like my cock was dipped in lava
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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