The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
Sometimes to bang a cougar u gotta play wii With her kids
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
Seriously. You just grinded your ass all over the heisman trophy's dick. I want you to think about that.
Def walking back to my apt with a blender, an empty vodka bottle, and a half eAtn drumstick cone.
You wouldn't be the first friend to shit himself in the last 7 days
It is very possible that having sex with you just now just got me into Yale
I mean, the sex was awesome last weekend, but I didn't even imagine I'd reached ovarian rupture status.
So my flight takes off at 8am. Does this mean I need to break my airport bar pre-flight ritual?
Aren't you the one who taught me that airports are the judgement-free drinking zone?
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He sang a ten minute song about me sitting on his face and eating quesadillas. Pretty sure I have to marry him.
I don't want too, lol. I'm currently awaiting my next period like its the second coming of christ
Someone sitting next to me at this football game is totally eating chicken nuggets out of his pocket and drinking four loko. I wanna be him.
Randomize
