I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
Walk of shame was bad enough, but farting with each step as I walked past his roommates was just not cosmically fair.
i asked him how he could stand the smell of skunk. his answer was "it smells like good weed"...
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
This milkshake tastes better than sex. Priorities, I have them.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Waking up at a teachers house is a very confusing thing
Will you trust fall hold me, so I can pee of this building.
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
Would you still love me and fuck me doggie style if I had a dinosaur tramp stamp?
Also what’s the official rule on washing one guy’s jizz off my back before I go out with another guy? That I should?
Do you think he’ll fall in love with me if I tell him I have a nickname for his penis
Randomize
