She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
he's afraid if he sleeps with me i'll go all lavender brown on him
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
I hit 10,000 texts this month.. I think my grandkids have carpal tunnel.
I'm the only adult here not drinking and their 2 year old daughter is trying to play dolls with me.. I've never been so demoralized in my life.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
She was our DD the least I could do is have sex with her. Even when drunk I'm still chivalrous.
Maybe not, but you have to admit watching him get hit by the car was gratifying
make that a herd of moose. they will be my moose minions
I hope you get your threesome on vday. I'll probably get flowers and a candlelit dinner. trade you. I wish this guy was more of a slut and had less of a heart. I would like 2 dicks please fuck your flowers!
He is such a generous lover, I can look past the fact his name is fucking Bob.
Clearly I'm trying to change the world one fuck at a time
you DO IT for the people
Like, yea, let's talk sexy but also...LOOK! I SAW A CAT!
If someone tells me they're a paramedic, how inappropriate is it for me to ask what their save to kill ratio is?
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