ive never been so in love with another man before, in a totally none sexual way... no homo
I think I'm going to die by hangover. I'm in my spanish class. So I guess I'm going to be muerte.
too bad being hungover isnt a job. just threw up from 9am to 5pm
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
the elusive kegmastree, who's mystery is only exceeded by it's power
I can't decide who is the bigger alcoholic: you for opening that bottle of wine just now or me for hearing it in the other room over the air conditioner
You demanded I give you a glass of water, so I set it down in front of you and you knock it over and roll in it..,
I wanted to be a dolphin.
I am sleeping in the bathtub because my bed is too soft.
So yeah he had good weed?
i have my bailey's and coffee which lasts me until lunch, at which time its appropriate for me to bring a vodka and OJ mix for the afternoon. This university thing is grrreat
I heard from the downstairs bathroom "WHY CAN'T I WIPE MY ASS IN PEACE!" and a pisscrate of glass bottles breaking
Sometimes I think he has a hidden camera in my vagina so he knows what I'm doing and saying at all times...
WHY IS SHE PANDERING YOU, A SIMPLE GOBLIN, TINY WEENER PICTURES OVER STATE LINES
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I think I'm just going to get a farm, a vibrater, and a lot of wine.
Randomize
