He proposed that we "bone". I've completely given up on boys.
We couldn't even have sex we were both laughing so hard. I don't know how I feel about the quality of that weed.
Dude just walked down the street literally wearing nothing but a small box around his waist carrying a case of beer. I want to live here for the rest of my life.
got high to the hills theme song. FEEL THE RAIN ON YOUR SKIN. no regrets.
One day. I will touch his hair. I'm curious if it'll be like a soft cloud.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
You were all "think outside the box, inside the bag!" as you filled your camelback with beer.
"Work from home" is code for "morning drinks" right?
The more I piece together last night the more I want to vomit it out of my brain.
just bought myself a "your about to get violated in every way so you deserve this chipotle" steak bowl.
When are your genitals available?
I think she tried to suffocate me with her tits...she almost succeeded.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
so on a scale from morning glass of wine to that time i burnt the garage down how drunk were you last night
About 'lets tie a boat to a truck and ride it down the freeway'
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
Randomize
