dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
So two questions...why am I covered in muffins and are there pictures of this.
Fact: Chilis at the airport in JAX will serve you shots of jack at 6:45 with breakfast. Ya I missed my flight.
So when does your new flight leave?
At my shot/hour ratio.... I leave in 16 shots. I love flying
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Nothing like a little " am I gonna shit myself " to spice up the work day
Your roommates will be treating you to many anecdotes about my intentions to have aggressive sex with you. I'm sorry in advance.
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
He told us a story about a time his 80 year old uncle karate chopped a dick in a glory hole.
Lynn just told me "I heard about your divorce. Condoms or morning pill your choice and I'm buying". Sorry but I got plans now bro.
god i just can't wait for finals to end so i can just masturbate all day and night
true. but still. you know how big of a sucker i am for a penis and a pretty face.
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