found some acid from a couple months ago while looking through christmas lights. Looks like santa came early this year.
What happened?....
He lifted up the blanket, and whispered "Don't do it" to his sperm....
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
She's legit crying about wanting more sex. Holy shit.
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
Walking through campus with a grocery bag full of pot brownies. I'm like the santa claus of 4/20
Just for future reference, me asking if you're free, followed by a winking face is not my way of suggesting a tandem bike ride.
too late I already started a fight with someone named luscious
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
Baked out of my mind. Went in the bathroom, a daddy long leg spider and a carpenter ant are battling it out on the floor. I brought my computer with some dubstep.
OMG THE ANT WON
Dude. why do I feel like I am cheating on you every time I do shrooms?
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
Randomize
