So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
My "High Times" magazine came in today, as well as my girlfriend's new sex toys. We're calling in sick today.
Forgot that I saved my paper as "Eat Shit Edwards" and e-mailed it because I missed class. I'm sure Prof. Edwards will be delighted when she gets it. I don't anticipate a passing grade.
They upped the price of Plan B! Rite-aid is going to be the reason I have illegitimate kids.
ohhh no, absolutely not. i am waaayyy too superstitious to have sex with the self-proclaimed "baby-maker" on father's day...
I am gunna fuck the accent right out of her mouth
you spent the rest of the night making a recipe for mixed drink called "the new years bowel remover". it has 13 parts but judging from the bold all caps, the boiled avocado is the most important
i climbed out of the bath tub this morning and found him taped to the treadmill
He knows my period schedule but not my work schedule.
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Eh, not fuck buddies. I prefer sexercise partner.
It's one of those mornings where you wake up and want to go to church for the first time in ten years. THAT shameful.
Is it socially acceptable to be blind drunk at half five on a Monday afternoon?
Which pub are you in?
Yo, I totally had forgotten you were CA. Thank you for making my life easier with modern medicine.
Randomize