You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
We were both halfway out the window trying to give each other high fives over the roof while the dude was going 150.
I can't keep up with all the guys you're banging. I'm just going to start referring to them by city of origin.
My nipple piercings are like the guardrails, that's why they feel so safe.
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
And then I cried about the Cubs for a half hour. If my dignity hadn't already been lost by that point in the night, it sure as hell was then.
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
I achieved maximum drunk last night. It was pretty extreme. Woke up on a couch, outside, in a suit
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
But seriously, I love having sex with you and simultaneously know I never wanna date you.
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
Theres a free llama on craigslist. Are you in or are you in?
I cant promise hot guys but i can promise alcohol which is close enough.
Randomize
