Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
he just fed my chickens on farmville...i guess that's his way of saying thanks for the sex<3
the way i see it him paying 500 bucks for my fake abortion is karma's way of punishing him for cheating on his wife
he's mad because you were 'slandering his penis'.
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
He just called me juicy booty via text message.
All I know is that either you or I told a black guy that he looked like usher and he was sexy and that is our confession
No, the weekend was great. It was the waking up in the pond in the raft without an oar that sucked. That fucking water is cold at 7am.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
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