I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Is it weird that we showed each other our pussy's and pointed out the good and bad things about each others??
i wish peter jackson would direct porn
Please tell me the foreign boys in the kitchen this morning were yours.
He counted every piece of macaroni in the box and then faceplanted into the bowl
It was rough. I have dried puke in my hair and I don't know if it's mine or from the girl I met on the ground waiting for a cab.
All I want to do is get high and needlepoint. Fuck your judgement
that's the second time I've left that bar and slept with the person that's driven my car. thank god I don't take cabs..
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
I woke up with pitch black feet and crushed doritos around my mouth. That's how I determined how my night went
I was simply suggesting that you really should try coke bondage sex.
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
Randomize
