sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
I just realized that i have never seen about 30 percent of my friends sober before
I've never seen anyone write a check for a bar tab before
well, 500 bucks doesn't grown on trees, and i need that bear suit for any chance of vagina access.
Well I woke up with spatula marks on my ass and burns on my hands.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Her pussy was so beautiful. That's what I'LL miss the most. Not the omelets. You're the roommate, obviously our priorities on this situation are vastly different.
i'll booty call him tonight after the radiohead concert, that way he can see his favorite band and his favorite vagina all in one night.
I picked a bad day to wear the catch me fuck me shoes.
Did someone catch you and fuck you?
brushed my teeth nine times since getting home, still afraid there are pubes hiding in between my molars. fucking gummy bears
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
Asking me to suck on my nipples isn't going to make me less mad at you.
woke up to two girls crawling on top of me forcefeeding me bacon. Best. Hangover. Ever.
Randomize
