it's 4 am, i'm drinkin beer and re-drywalling my bathroom. this could possibly be a bad idea.
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
I think it's our patriotic duty to get high and watch the state of the union tonight
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
So your bra was hanging in the Christmas tree last night at some point I think
Pretty sure I was high. I thought there was music coming out of my makeup bag.
Why is it every time you ask me what I'm doing, I'm at a police station?
well my grandpa saw your dick pic, so why don't you tell me how my day is going
I won the 'drunkest person at a family event' award tonight.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
It's nice doing the walk of shame at 530 am, the birds are chirping, campus is empty, and it's dark so noone can see who the Fuck you are
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