be a good friend and just tell me i'm not pregnant
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
it's been a while because I don't count the hooker
That was nice of you. Thank you for respecting the fact that I got cockblocked by a sophomore last night.
I might have hooked up with a 2003 alumni last night in the basement
Dude you were ten when he graduated
Wahoowaaaaaaa
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
You were greeting everyone with " Hi I'm Jess show me your dick" whether they were dudes or not.
I feel like there's no sexy way to pull 12 condoms out of your bra.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
and i do believe that will be the last time you send me a photograph of our mother in her underwear.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
Randomize
