ask me if i forgot to go to a midterm today
let's put it this way: i'm gonna stop drinking and get a gym membership. she's that hot
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
I mean like, my liver will beg my brain for mercy. Brainll be like I'm Greg Jennings. Liverll be like I'm Darren Sharper. Brainll be like hold my diiiiick.
If I wasn't stoned and knee deep in cheese and crackers I'd help.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
If so I'm coming over there. There's no way I'm having "hello, how are you" conversations with my neighbors on acid
Gonna be late for work. Sex comes first. Priorities.
Such a big mess for such a small penis
no, it was more of an i-don't-think-he-even-knows-what-a-clitoris-is, bad.
momentary stint on a second floor library computer...guy next to me snorted blue adderall off his notebook through a cut straw, i cant tell if this guy is my hero or just plain crazy...
As long as it's more "this is where i see an issue" vs "psst.... tiddies" then i have no argument
Randomize
