the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
I don't have a choice really. It's either lose 15 lbs by Halloween, or I'm going as a giant banana.
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
obviously my window is still shattered. they're pressure washing my condo today. i think i need a bloody mary.
This is your typical drubkba Amy test. Shout out to jisus for auto correct
First stoner thought of the day: Life would be so much better if there were more things that were biscuits and gravy flavored.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Dude, you vomitted into a trashcan wearing your bear hands and high heels. Your drug dealer even said that was rough.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Do you wanna do something, or just stare at each other and fantasize about death like we usually do
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Randomize
