Nothing says "I'm a sorority girl" like puking at 830 in the am, wearing my anti-hazing pin, and getting ready for a tea party.
We left the house and she said "let's go dick hunting" theres no way last night was gonna end up well
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
You need to call dibs on the blond with the tits. It's your birthday.
Haha hell yea
Because if someone gets to see those.. It should be you. It's like God telling you Happy Birthday.
So I bet a guy he could drink two irish car bombs faster than me and I lost. now he gets to name our first son. sory.
Why are friend nudes not more of a thing? My tits look awesome right now.
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
Good new is, my parents are alive. Better news they will be in the hospital all weekend. Best news is im having a house party. All weekend.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
i'm trying not to stalk him on facebook
i gave in
i have a serious question for you... Why I am i not wearing any pants?
Can you dump a guy for having pierced nipples or is that shallow?
Randomize
