I really think my calling is to star in a Live Links commercial
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
he changed my name in his contacts to "rick", so his mom wouldn't know he was texting me
only you would photoshop your dick
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
yea i guess its safe to say fire extinguishers are not synonymous with whip cream cans
I have never made a good decision in that bathroom...
Walking back from greek row alone at 3:30am in a child's kangaroo suit...not my proudest moment
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
we are out of drugs. and patience. please bring former.
I'm giving random strangers at the bar sips of my fishbowl, then telling them I have Ebola. It's a fun night.
when I was walking home I wad so excited to see a cat on the sidewalk but it was really a traffic cone
The playlist was "songs to sing in the shower". I literally got fucked to Footloose.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
Randomize
