I need a slap back to reality. Or at least a slap back to homosexuality
And we hooked up in the carwash. I told you our creative juices were flowing today.
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
She even gives head with a lisp.
Shaun got a portable breathalyzer for christmas so now we can tell who the biggest pussy is at the end of the night.
couldn't find my pants so i stole a pair of shorts from the passed out kid in the corner.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
if girls can go out in miniskirts and reveal their thongs, I should be able to wear a sheer dress with boyshorts with the word love bedazzled on my ass.
This is why you're my favorite.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
I may be a feminist, but I am not above using my body to distract you if it means I might beat you in a game of scrabble.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
You ran up a $300 bar bill on his card and he didn't have you arrested, be grateful and move on.
She pregamed while taking a shower. Came out clean and drunk.
Randomize
