I am too pretty for them to be this angry at me.
I think they should rename 16 and pregnant to "I was fucked in highschool and all I got was a baby and humiliated infront of the nation on MTV"
Met some locals. They are taking me to a place where there is topless bullriding. I love this country.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
we were boning in the bathroom when her boyfriend came upstairs. I wish i could remember what happened next more clearly, because it had to have been hilarious
the last thing i remember saying is "hope you like body hair"
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
Toilet is so comfy. Serious question/why does weed make every surface feel like bed?
I have 4 passes to the spa here, walking around with a robe on and putting cucumber slices on my penis. You guys should come hang out here. It's very relaxing
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He said you asked to eat pepperoni off his dick and he thought it was weird
I mean I thought it sounded fun
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I can't believe you're forcing me to handle this hangover sober
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
Got arrested last night. My cell mate just added me on Facebook.
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