i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
You know how I told you I don't have many naked pics? Apparently that changed last night.
Yes, I am watching The Hills Have Thighs. And yes it is a porno remake of The Hills Have Eyes. And, again, yes, lesbian sex in the desert. Get the sand out.
she fell through a window trying to flash someone
I've decided I'm either going to ease him into this breakup by having a threesome with him and the girl I'm leaving him for, or be brutal and fuck his room mate. it depends how nice he is tonight.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
We made it a contest to fuck on everything in your room while you were on vacation.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
That's the international "my vagina is unoccupied, come talk to us" chant. You have your mission. Go.
Do I lose at life if I cry in a grocery store while buying a pregnancy test?
I don't know what his name was or what he looked like, but I remember him rocking me to sleep with his cock
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Not sure who they are or where we're going but they just bought me 3 tacos so I'm staying.
She was here for a threesome... She doesn't have to put the new roll of toilet paper on the dispenser. She can leave the new roll wherever she wants!
I'm going to blow a ton of money on sex toys just so I can tell you to do better than them.
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