He's a good guy, we stopped by his old church.
And you didn't burst into flames?
There are beer cans & oyster shells along the side of the road. I belong here
It wasn't a threesome, it was me making out with one while looking at the other one screaming "does this make you jealous?"
woke up outside on the porch naked surrounded by beer cans with a towl around my neck. i must be in heaven cause i've never seen this place before.
If you've never been partying there before, take Shae with you. Drunk Shae is like a GPS. She found us the only bottle shop still open at four, a pot dealer, and told us all which subway to take to get home. She'd never been to Madrid before. It was awesome.
I just washed my birth control down with captain because I don't have any water and I need to wash the blood off my face before I leave my room.....
Remember when I said I had my shit together?
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
then he told me my boobs feel like "if you put mushroom soup in a baggie." I don't know how I'm supposed to feel about this.
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
Getting paid in weed to watch a pregnant adult with cooking skills is the TITS
she told him my safe word. I'm gonna casually work it into conversation and at him suggestively to see if he realizes i want to have rough sex with him
Do you ever just admire your boobs?
I peed on his bed and he still likes me. #keeper
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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