im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
she was dressed as a doctor claiming that after she was done i would have a "permaboner"
May or may not have found my way onto a stripper bus. To Chicago.
Jeff just maced a waitress...it's way too early for this.
who put toothpaste on EVERY doorknob in my house?!
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Is this a genuine concern or are you just high?
JUST BECAUSE I'M HIGH DOESN'T MEAN ITS NOT GENUINE CONCERN.
What did he say? I couldn't hear him over the sound of how awesome his beard is.
I've never been to a "going away to jail" cookout. do we bring a present?
There are two types of people in this world I don't trust: people who collect stamps, and people who don't drink
Okay so my USC tutor just offered to eat me out. I think I'm definitely applying to USC.
I had sex with marker all over my face so I can do just about anything.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
It's a beautiful day to be high as fuck
Randomize
