Be sure to let me know if your relationship crumbles so I can resume hitting on you
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
This dress was meant to end up on your floor
Driving out to Plano is like driving away from your twenties
He said he only talked to me because I talk dirty in bed.
I've never known a guy to fuck more random girls in the ass then Dom. His rectal kill ratio is at like 85%
He's like the Derek Jeter of Anal
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
Should I tell them about my ticket for possession or about how I'm shitting blood? Which one will gain the most sympathy?
You realize that if you get murdered while we're talking, I'm gonna have to explain to your next of kin why the last thing on your phone is a picture of my boobs.
If the sex wasn't incredible why would I compare it to cheesy tots
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
My lack of taco bell is hindering me from seeing the good part of that situation
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
Randomize
