her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
As weird as that was it was probably the best advice i've ever gotten from a tranny
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
He turned off the music when i walked in and introduced me to everyone. then they gave me jager and made me chug it while holding a giant purple dildo. everything resumed when i finished
I'm not mad at you for letting me use my air mattress as a toilet, i'm mad at you for letting me lay back down on it.
I think the best part was the fact that the stripper's lock screen was a picture of the virgin mary
the girl whose rug I peed on is here
He came in two seconds and stole my pizza so I'm not counting it.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
Sexting and pancakes... It's going to be hard to top that
They left me at home... I'm a liability
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