we couldnt tell if he was gay so we started working glee quotes into the conversation to see if he noticed.
Her name is Sherri and her sister's are Brandy and Champagne. Of course I want to meet her parents.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Bro, he broke his neck diving into a kiddy pool.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Carving a pumpkin in a gay bar at 2am. How did my life get to be this way.
The only excuse this guy at the club had for trying to make out with me as soon as I met him was "I AM FROM MEXICOOO"
omg this is getting ridiculous. nobody's vagina should ever be this neglected.
I just smoked a bowl with the lady who runs the special olympics. Your move.
guys with girlfriends don't have a leg to stand on when they get mad at you for fucking other guys
I might have been the first person in 2015 to throw up on a yellow cab before climbing in it.
Do you ever get so high you're like vibrating
His truck was very sexy. Unfortunately, shortly thereafter, I discovered that the whole overcompensating thing is very true...
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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