covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
I'm gonna have to flying elbow somebody tonight in memory of Macho Man
Bonus points if someone shits their pants. Only 1/2 bonus points if it's you
Bonus points are bonus points regardless
Oh my god I forgot there were Band-Aids on my nipples
I miss the good ol days when id just come home from school and thered be a costco size box of condoms on my bed.
my parents really loved me back then.
I WILL PAPERCUT YOUR URETHRA YOU DO NOT STEAL A MANS SECOND BIG MAC
That night just went downhill after you pissed yourself while sitting on my lap
You showed up at my front door in a bikini with a fifth of tequila it was like the opening to a porno
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
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