Being hungover naked and coloring my hair. I guess I am not naked I have black latex gloves on. Give me a call.
im coming over.
He keeps saying he loves me and ruining perfectly good conversations.
If i have to listen to his problems about his girlfriend, he should at least let me suck his cock.
you fucking puked into the top of the beer bong while i was chugging from it. when i realized i was chugging your vomit, i vomitted on the floor. she kicked us both out.
Well, I wanted to be you for Halloween but I couldn't fit seven dicks in my mouth.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
I just rolled over in bed and felt a bump. Turns out it was a lil nug. Talk about being princess and the weed.
My goal is to not catch on fire... But if i have to dance im going to dance regardless of the danger
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
It makes showers more interesting trying to drink a gin and tonic and keep soap out of my eyes at the same time.
You need to calm down.
Found out my grandpa had two wives and found out I'm eligible for some internships 11/10 would do acid again.
Honestly no idea how dad figured out i did all that gay porn unless he was looking at gay porn.
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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