How many times do you have to sleep with a guy before you get him to kiss you???
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
Pros and cons of selling your underwear to a guy on craigslist. Go.
Come down off the roof.
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
I rammed pretzels and Jell-O shots down the throats of those I loved.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
he fucked me wearing a cowboy hat and made grits after
We call him Texas for a reason.
Let's go. I'm waiting for my time to shine among the stars of never never land. Make sure you bring my Peter Pan costume this time. Shit's bout to get real glittery.
the insurance claim form from last night says foreign object removal from genitourinary tract so as far as the insurance company knows, it could have been a gerbil
I'm glad you got documented proof of my stupidity with a head full of nitrous
Hahaha and I'm glad you are doing whip its at a childrens basketball game
Turns out the guy I did all that coke with the other night is a cop
We're dating now
Okay. Did I say I did anything unusual? Because I usually do weird stuff. Did I clean mirrors? My mirrors are really clean, and I think I remember having windex..
thank you for being so understanding of my weak stomach and poor self-control
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
I'm not saying it wasn't great. I'm just saying sleeping with a gassy, depressed,45 year old mother was a different experience. Would do it again though.
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