Apparently you walked through my house with your dress on your head
At least you weren't that one girl in the bar that was letting everyone draw on her in sharpie. Worst decision I've ever witnessed.
I'd invite him but there's too many people who have fucked me going already
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I can't. I can't get out. He cooked me food. And made me jager bombs. And painted a glow in the dark smilie face on my boobs
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
Well... When your girlfriend fucks your sister, the 2 week courtesy window goes out the door.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
dude when I get home wanna help me fulfill my dream of smoking a bowl out of my saxophone?
HOW DO YOU GET TO BE A GROWN-UP AND NOT KNOW WHAT A DECADE IS!?
I guess you never know how much of an impact you have on someone until you sleep with their cousin
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I just discovered my new vice. Cotton candy vodka. Its like a carnival in my mouth, puking of the tilt-a-whirl included.
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
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