and this is why I hate my dad. He got 25x more angry with me when I wanted to drive a different route then he suggested to get to his house (more scenic- thus more enjoyable) then he did when I told him I was driving drunk with 4 people in the car and I got my 5th speeding ticket last night.
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
do you have any idea how hard it is to keep a boner while another dude is writing on your dick in sharpie?
Haga you didnt jbsii whee wu an therer
Party on wayne
Dude, you sent that text at 9:44 AM. Who thinks of drugs that early?
Are you having sex right now? Or is the apt just swaying rhythmically on its own? Either way, awesome.
Who knows? Maybe we can sing afternoon delight into each other's genitals.
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
I woke up to a quacking alarm clock and a rando in my bed. I told him I liked his cargo shorts. Fireball is not my soulmate anymore.
You kept screaming, "Fuck her right in the personality" and then kissed a guy and slapped him across the face
Idk I've taught my 18 month old how to say nipple so kids aren't all bad
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
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