Got a little crazy huh? Happy st pattys day. None of you have any idea where my credit card would be do you? How do i always lose
we couldn't afford a big pool so we bought 2 kiddie pools and put the inflatable beer pong table inbetween. get over here. now.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
She took a picture of me when she thought I was sleeping. I don't know whether to be amused or scared.
we kept pushing you at the prospective students saying go for it, itll make them want to come here
you kept yelling THIS ONES FOR THE ADMISSIONS OFFICE and then youd go in for the kill
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
Apparently I blacked out and pissed all over the sliding glass door from the inside, as everyone watched from the outside helplessly....
Just keep my face away from hard objects. And by that I do not mean erect penised.... those are totally fine. It's more just things like rocks, table edges, blunt objects, etc so I don't get another concussion.
I thought it was my alarm clock, turns out it was her vibrator still going off on the side of my face.
I screamed "I want dick!" in the middle of the intersection. So many hot guys. I wish you were here.
I found your missing hash cookies. Fuck you and I'm sorry but there are only 2 left. I already had the munchies.
Are you playing pokemon in the dark and sexting? I can't be mad at that.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Randomize
