'in an unhealthy relationship' should def be an fb option
Five girls, one freshman pledge. We're like our own Make A Wish Foundation.
Yeah! I got cockblocked by the blizzard last night. Lost girl on way to my apartment. Not a joke
You don't even know the meaning of faking an orgasm until you sleep with an uncircumcised ginger.
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
you probably have like 11 voicemails from us, one is us singing my heart will go on while were fucking
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I mean, two foreign guys have drunkenly confessed their love for her, so she's clearly doing something right.
Happy 4th. Did you guys get your syphilis thing taken care of?
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
