Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
We just described beer as "big boy apple juice" to his 2 year old.
someone just broke into my class and invited everyone to the bar ...now we're filling out a police report. awesome.
I'm handcuffed to the toilet. Don't ask
so he woke up after being passed out and yelled that he had brought back moon rocks for everybody...
Things got outta hand once she told me to water-board her with Patron.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Let's learn from last year: Leave the handcuffs at home on St Patrick's Day.
I gave him my yeast infection. HOW THE FUCK DOES THAT EVEN WORK?
I stole all of the toasting champagne and did an interpretive dance to "wind beneath my wings". I am literally everything you're not supposed to do at weddings.
But your showmanship is impeccable.
ANNA HAS DISCOVERED EROTIC FANFICTION OF SHARKNADO THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I'd risk everything I own for 10 min naked with her, 2 would be sex and the rest me crying like a little girl.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
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